A Toast to the “Red Headed Slut”

Day 1: The day before

The much awaited bachelorette party for Jessica Rabbit began Friday afternoon when a group of sexy ladies drove up to Tahoe for the weekend. It wouldn’t be a party without a little mishap on the first night, right? A) I decided to wear a cute little designer skirt with beads to dinner that somehow got stuck in the little holes of the patio furniture. It just took a little wiggling to get out, no big deal. B) Jenna pulled an illegal u-turn in the middle of the road right in front of a Mercedes. No worries, nothing happened to the rented car. 3) Just as we settled into bed for the evening Heather claimed that something was crawling all over her as she scratched her body in a panic. We found nothing and determined she was either crazy or on crack. Both likely. (Kidding Heather)

Day 2: The day of

On the way to the lake the next morning I managed to stub my toe on a raised portion of the path. I have a sweet blood blister to prove it. We set up camp, and to our surprise a bachelor party of 13 men was stationed right next to us. They had rented a boat, which we quickly took over free of cost. It turned out that since we had 9 girls, there was no room for the men. We took a driver, a flag holder, and left the remainder of the bachelor party behind. Thanks for the boat boys! Idiots.

After a long day it was time for a pedicure, gifts, dinner, and VEX. Pedicures were awesome, the gifts were sexy, the dinner was amazing, and VEX was................. a blur.

Day 3: The morning after...........

I recall drinking a little Champaign during gifts, a little wine during dinner, and toasting a “Red Headed Slut” with the ladies. I quickly went from sober to sick. I hate that! You totally miss that fun buzz. The night lasted, well forever. We managed to get into bed around 5am Sunday morning. I shot out of my sleeping at 5:45am with an upset stomach. I quickly ran down the narrow stairs of the cabin. My feet are kind of big so I had to run with my toes pointed out to avoid falling. To my surprise there were already two sick women occupying the bathrooms (Brynne and Jenny). The trashcan was the next best thing. My pasta dinner didn’t smell so good coming up. I decided to nap a little by the can, just incase I started feeling a little woozy again.

Hours later Brynne and I set off on a breakfast adventure, and managed to find a hole in the wall coffee shop. The smell of pastries and coffee were not settling well. The woman working the counter noticed our, lets say tore back look, and jumped to conclusions recommending a burger from Ernie’s as a hangover remedy. We smiled, trying not to appear as if we were up all night. We just acted like it was perfectly normal to crave burgers for breakfast, and drove away. Ernie’s was quite crowded. I suppose all of the VEX customers were there for their morning chow. We needed food NOW. We wanted that burger. MC Donald’s, here we come! We sat for what seemed to be forever in the drive through of Mc Donald’s, drove up to order, and were told that lunch was not served until 10:30am. It was 10:06am. “What the FU@K!???????,” Brynne yelled in the window. We pulled out of the drivethrough sideways, but safely. We needed that burger and decided to wait around inside staring the burger makers down until clock struck 10:30am. Finally! Best burger and fries ever.

The ice cream shop opened at 11am, so we decided, why not? Walking up the steps to the old ice cream parlor, guess who stubs the opposite toe and stumbles? Yep, me. AAAAAAA. Regardless, hair up and braless, we walk in. No other then the woman we had seen hours before at the coffee shop was standing there. “You ladies feeling better, she asked? I replied, “It’s been a rough morning.” I got my Kona coffee ice cream in a cup and took off. I was glad Jenna was in charge of the drive home. Down highway 50, through the house door, and straight to bed.

Why is it that a week later we say, “That was a good time.” Hmmm. That’s not what I was thinking at 5:45 am Sunday morning. Happy Bachelorette Brynne. I love you.

A word to the readers......... I just wanted to say that I am not an advocate of drinking or stealing boats. I actually do not partake either one on a regular basis. You probably noticed it only took me 3 drinks to barf. It's just that, well, who can turn down a redhead????? hmmmmm Not Ken, not me.